"PASTORAL THEOLOGY & PRACTICE" PROF. HAROLD SENKBEIL & DR. RICHARD WARNECK CAPTIONING PROVIDED BY: CAPTION FIRST, INC. P.O. BOX 1924 Lombard, IL 60148 1-800-825-7234 * * * * * This is being provided in a rough-draft format. Communication Access Realtime Translation (CART) is provided in Order to facilitate communication accessibility and may not be a totally verbatim record of the proceedings * * * * >> ERIC: You know, I asked the question about what to do when one member of the couple is not a Christian. But more common here are marriages between Christians of different denominations: Catholic and Lutheran, for instance. Is there something that a pastor should say in this circumstance? Can a Lutheran marriage ceremony be conducted in such a case? >> PROF. HAROLD SENKBEIL: Well, Eric, it's not just in New Jersey that those kinds of things happen, but frequently, I'd say increasingly frequently all across the country, as denominational affiliations become less and less important, people seem to be looking everywhere for marriage partners. And sometimes it's not even on their radar screen as to whether that person shares their own faith. Now, that's a matter of some concern, of course. And one of the things we want to do, I think, as pastors in training our young people is in teaching them regarding, first of all what marriage is, because unfortunately it's under attack in so many ways in our 21st Century culture. But also we'd want to teach them regarding the spiritual center of marriage and the importance of faith in a Christian life in the home between husband and wife and with the children that God gives them. So this unity of faith is a very, very important matter. Now, what do we do when a couple comes to us very much in love and clearly intending to be married even though they do not share this common confession, they are in opposing confession�-- they are both Christians but they have opposing confessions of that faith? Well, I think one would want to talk to them about the importance of the centrality of Christ in the home and of a spiritual life which continues in terms of prayer in that home and devotional life and certainly continuing to be faithful to the means of grace, that is to receive the gifts of God through his Word and Sacraments in their individual churches if they intend not to join into one common confession. But I think before that happens, you'd want to encourage them also: Why don't you find out everything you can about your fiance's faith? I myself, in my pastoral ministry, always encourage couples like that to do exactly that, if at all possible, to sit in on the formal instruction that are given to adults who are intending to join that church, let's say in this case the Roman Catholic church, that both parties, the Catholic and the Lutheran party would attend that class and also by the same token, that the couple would also attend the class that I'm teaching regarding Lutheran instruction and the Lutheran faith. With the intent that there would be a thorough understanding and comprehension of where each party is and their own relationship with God and their own convictions regarding what God teaches in his word. Now, ideally the other party, in this case the Roman Catholic, would determine to join our Lutheran church. But care must be exhibited here so that we don't force that person into the faith just for the sake of keeping up with their in-laws' expectations. It should be a matter of joyful and free conviction, a whole hearted assent to the truth of the doctrine which we confess. Now let's say that the couple have done this work. They've engaged in this kind of preliminary investigation. But they have determined that for now at least they're going to maintain their individual church memberships. Can such a marriage succeed? Well, of course it can. I've seen this happen myself in my ministry. Are there going to be great factors and struggles to overcome? There surely will. And so one of the things you want to do is to prepare them to face those things. How do we manage faithful participation and attendance at church services, for example, for both of us? Perhaps it would be possible for both to attend both churches. Of course receiving Holy Communion only in that church where they are a member. And also that they would, in their own household, begin to develop a life of prayer and devotion together which they can establish already early in their marriage and that they can continue with, then, as children come into their life. Now, how is it that we conduct such weddings? It's important that you remember that a wedding ceremony is not just a perfunctory ceremony or external ritual but as we practice it in our church, it is indeed a public worship service. And so all the parameters that go into planning a public worship service also govern these marriage ceremonies. Part of that would be the fact that as a Lutheran pastor, you would be the sole officiant. In the case of a person who comes from another communion or faith, their pastor might certainly want to be a part of the occasion. And it would be very appropriate, of course, to invite him, in some cases now her, to attend the wedding, to be a part of the congregation assembled in the pews and to offer a word of encouragement or blessing which could be done outside of the ceremony, outside of the marriage service, preferably, perhaps, a very ideal time would be at the wedding banquet and the reception. I think that's a wonderful way to handle this kind of Christian compassion toward others and Christian hospitality without compromising our principles of church fellowship. That also holds true, then, when it comes to the planning of the service. And I think maybe we'll have a chance to talk about that in detail a little bit later. But for now, just keep in mind that in planning the marriage ceremony, it's a worship service. That helps a lot. Great question, Eric. * * * * * This is being provided in a rough-draft format. Communication Access Realtime Translation (CART) is provided in Order to facilitate communication accessibility and may not be a totally verbatim record of the proceedings * * * *